I have previously mentioned the primary love of my life, my husband, Richard. Now I will introduce you to another love, my cat Newps. His full name is Newpimp Dave Weedfluid. According to popular legend, he is not actually a cat, but a type of animal called a “newpimp”, and his real name is Mitch, making him Mitch the newpimp. Other legends simply refer to him as the Bushytail Ringtailed Newpimp. Most friends of Newps pay no attention to semantics and simply call him Newps.
There are a few important things to know about Newps. He is exceedingly intelligent and refined in demeanor. He can stand up on his back legs and “box” for treats. His record includes multiple accounts of larceny of corn on the cob. He will kick his own head repeatedly if you hold him on his back. He enjoys raw zucchini and tortilla chips.
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